He Answered

 Its Thursday, but I have something to post. 

I just received an answer to prayer. Now with this answer, I have even more questions and am trying to figure out what to ask next.

So, I have been out here...feeling a bit unwanted.
A whole lot unwanted. Self esteem dipping low. Dragging and sweeping the dust off the floor low and i have been trying to get past this transgression i made this month.

I have been avoiding asking God this because I wanted to be a boss and make it on my own. I thought I was doing ok until June came around.

So I prayed to know if the Lord has someone for me and wants me to be married. I asked Him if He didn't want me to get married and I should be single for the rest of my life, for Him to have one of my family members say the name of my son's father in my hearing this week. If I heard his name, then I would hVe to let go of all plans and hope about being in an awesome relationship.

Now to know if God was saying yes to this marriage thing and Him having the perfect person for me. I asked simply to see my first name in print somewhere, but the name had to belong to someone else. My name has a very unusual spelling and it is extremely rare that I see my spelling anywhere. I only know two other people who have it, it's that uncommon.

I was watching a video and laughing along while scrolling through the comments section as I often do and I came across the name.

I took a screen shot and put todays date in it.

Todays scripture is Mark 11:24

Therefore I say unto you, What things soever ye desire, when ye pray, believe that ye receive them, and ye shall have them.
Mark 11:24 KJV

I read that first at midnight before going to the video.

So there is someone for me out there and God has them marked. So many questions, but I trust His choice and His plans for me. Hopefully I'll trust more as I will surely go through more turbulence.

I want this person to have certain qualities and motivate me to stay on the right path with Jesus. I will talk more about this as time goes on and I see His plan come to fruition.

God is good even to the evil. We have to do better yall.

Two other things. I had ordered a mountain bike from amazon but they never sent it so I cancelled the order. I drove around to three walmarts I search for a bike but couldn't find one for me. I decided to order from Walmart online. I placed my order and it came si early, literally the very next day.

I was so happy and now I have my son's mountain bike and mine to out together in my living room. Now Tuesday, I had returned home after trying to resolve a pipe burst situation at my parents house while they arr away in NC and I was tired. I wanted to close up my house and go tosleep but decided to adult and clean up. As I started to, I looked out my door and saw a huge box sitting on my front porch.

It was another bike Walmart sent by accident. I decided to put it in the suv that I just so happened to borrow that day and clean up my house. My intention was to return it on Wednesday.

Wednesday morning I'm in the bathroom and had my phone on silent but this moment it was with me as early as time was. I got a call from my parents that they had returned and were around the corner from my house.

I was so glad I cleaned my house up so I was not embarrassed.

I went to the store to get my son a few things and at check out told the cashier that I had a case of water on the bottom of my cart. She said ok but I didn't realize she didn't ring it up until I was walking towards the exit. We were talking about the job and I was encouraging her to try a different shift. I could have tried to walk out with the water but I went over to customer service, rang it up and checked out.

So I could have gotten away with a whole entire bike and case of water. Not sure why those things happened, but I'm glad I did the right thing.

I'm going to watch vids for the last part of my break, but wanted to share this. Stay encouraged, dont give up, and keep your focus on Jesus and He will work it out for you, no matter how messed up you may feel you are.

Have a great and blessed week!

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Additon, addendum...whatever, something I want to add a few hours later.

It is important to keep your prayers private between you and the Lord and not share with others before you get your answer. Don't write them down or speak them out because the enemy is always trying to send a counterfeit version your way.

I wrote my experience this morning and tell me why about 6am at my part time, I'm over hearing coworkers who I don't vibe well with asking another person if he has a girlfriend and his topic immediately went to marriage and wanting to be married. The one who has a child and I believe is married warned him not to get married. The guy is not seeing anyone right now. The girl who was talking to him had said some negative mess in my direction before and she is a jealous type of person towards many people including me. She talked about having an annoying boyfriend. It was such an odd conversation to be occurring. This seemingly nice, good looking, responsible guy blurts out he wants to be married and is single.

He is African, slightly taller than me, has a name snatched straight out the Bible, but for all the time up until about a week ago, I was ignored by him and felt less than compared to the other women who he would talk to. It was only when I was trying to dodge the boss on my way out the door and off my shift that he started speaking to me. I guess he thought I was trying to hide from him. He happened to be standing closer to me than boss (boss was the one who asked if he had a girlfriend). He has greeted me these last few times and it's just weird. You know my name now? Why are you talking to me?

I have alot of praying to do. I don't need to be confused and side tracked by counterfeits. Everything is counterfeit until proven not to be.

Now, I am going in to the dentist for my appointment to see if I broke my front tooth and how much it will coat to keep it or get an implant. His fault and mine for asking, he picked me up and tried to slam me down and my teeth hit his forehead causing a cut for him but  probably very expensive damage for me. I'll pay whatever I need to fix my smile. Sucks that this happened but this is part of the price to pay for sinful behavior.